Against all better judgement we descended on the Norfolk Spectacular this past weekend to watch the bands they housed on their 'Arena Stage'. For the uninitiated, first off - lucky you. But allow me to fill you in.
The Norfolk Spectacular, primarily is a festival for today's pop acts. Which are a lot worse than when I was a kid, or when anyone was I guess. But acts like N-Dubz, Tinnie Tempah and Chipmunk graced the main stage over the weekend, and organizers added a alternative stage at a later date. Kudos to them to actually bother, but based on the rather poor turnout (I hear the indie day on the Saturday had an even lower one!) I can't see them doing it again.
After we had to brave the queue for 90 minutes (which was full of utter scum, by the way. Imagine parents giving their fat, 12 year old kids cider and cigarettes and you'll start to scratch the surface of the disgusting excuses for humanity we had to withstand), we were let in and we headed to the aforementioned 'Arena Stage', which in actuality was where they hold the auctions for livestock. Classy right?
As a side note, I would have been majorly pissed off if I had bought a main stage ticket. Not because I'd shelled out almost £40 to see a bunch of children's entertainers (thanks Charlie Brooker for that one) play the same song all day, but the fact I'd paid £40 for a ticket that I could have got for £15 the day before the festival started. You see, at one point the stages were totally separate, but recently it was decided that anyone could see any stage, and when the UEA knocked the Arena tickets down to £15, well that meant you could see any stage for £15 for the day.
Anyhow, when we got to the cattle shed, it was pretty empty with just 30 minutes till the first act, and it never really filled up much all day. The busiest it got was when it started raining outside and the chavs from the main stage poured in, and managed to block both fire exits with their mere presence.
The acts then. It kicked off as we, and about 2 other people watched blues duo Dove & Boweevil (***) who did impress, even with an extremely short running time. The singing half of the act (Dove, obviously) had a great voice, but it's hard to get any sort of impression when a setlist lasts 15 minutes.
We never saw any of Cutback, and there was a bonus band not listed on the poster, who had the 80s hair metal vibe about them, seemed very enthusiastic but suffered from some poor sound further back, and were that memorable I can't even think of their name...
The Burning Crows (***) impressed whilst they were onstage, but the fact I repeatedly forgot their name as soon as they left (and again whilst typing this), and couldn't remember any of their songs is never a good sign.
You have to remember, that most of the acts (up till a certain point) only had about 20 minutes to make an impression, and that can be incredibly hard when you have act after act come out, as the next two bands found...
Dead Red (*) were another instantly forgettable band, only notable for having a female vocalist. Can't remember anything about them other than that. Equally bad were The Dirty Tricks (*), who were memorable at least, but for only being a totally insipid 'indie rock' band with a head numbing guitar sound. Naturally this is when the chavs descended due to the rain, and they ate it up. Speaks volumes.
After that onslaught, we just wanted Ginger and Terrorvision on the stage, but we had more to come. And when a bunch of indie kid looking guys wandered on the stage, we didn't have much in the way of expectations for Big Num (****), but we were dead wrong! The frontman opened his mouth and it was like Bon Scott reborn, very much an AC/DC style of band, but with individuality so they weren't just an AC/DC sound-a-like band. Highly recommended if you get a chance to take them out.
Slaves To Gravity (***) seemed to take the whole 'lack of crowd' thing a bit personally, although they quite rightly pointed out that everyone needed to cheer up. Fair point, everyone who wasn't in the front row looked miserable and bored. They were at a rock gig on a Sunday afternoon, cheer up! Slaves themselves were alright, was surprised to learn they were still going. A reasonable set, nothing more, nothing less.
The Qemists (*) represented the absolute nadir of the entire day. Seemingly a holdover from the main stage (and judging by the spotty little herberts that suddenly appeared, that must have been the case), they were just a really terrible version of Pendulum. But lacking any kind of originality. Or memorable songs. It started being mildly amusing, and they didn't play many songs but the ones they did play seemed to roll on for an eternity. Awful.
Thank God then, for Ginger Wildheart And Friends (*****), who salvaged the entire day with a fantastic set. Backed up by a brilliant band (Rich Jones, Willie Dowling, Ritch Battersby and 'Random' Jon Poole) they played everything from Wildhearts classics (Sick Of Drugs, My Baby Is A Headfuck, Suckerpunch) to newer material (Mazel Tov Cocktail and a hilariously renamed You Took The Sunshine From Norfolk) to even some Silver Ginger 5 stuff, which I had been waiting years to see live. Things were slightly disrupted by the usual pissed up, balding, middle aged guys throwing themselves against everyone, whilst not having the slightest idea what song was being played. Ah well, never mind - it was a great set...
Sick Of Drugs
My Baby Is A Headfuck
Suckerpunch
Taxi/Cheers
Mazel Tov Cocktail
Caffeine Bomb
You Took The Sunshine From New York
Vanilla Radio
Girls Are Better Than Boys
Brain Sugar
Sonic Shake
I Wanna Go Where The People Go
Terrorvision (****) rounded the day off nicely, and whilst I enjoyed them, I just didn't know as many of their songs as I did Ginger and Co. but they were terrifically entertaining, in particular frontman Tony Wright taking some potshots at the main stage ("This may be a cattle shed, but the sheep are over there!") before launching into a very appropriate 'Friends and Family' ("There's a party over here, fuck you over there!"). A top end to the day.
I honestly can't see next years Norfolk Spectacular featuring any kind of alternative stage, due to the total lack of interest shown this year. I'm still puzzled as to where the people went, they'd sold over 500 tickets and attendance barely crept over 100 tops. It's a shame as this sort of thing is exactly what this region needs. But if the crowds are mostly unenthusiastic, what can you do?
13 comments:
Agree with you on most things, however would take a star away from Ginger for going on about how shit it was. We knew - we were there! A lot of us had paid good money just to see him and then for him to ask his fellow band members to rate just how shit a time they were having was a kick in the teeth. It's not the first time he's done this either. I've been going to see him for over 15 years and I thought the band were playing an absolute blinder. Why did he need to say anything?
I see your point, but the guy is known for speaking his mind, and I was actually glad we weren't the only ones who were miffed with the whole day. Ginger's onstage banter makes his sets even better I think, it was in good humour after all I think.
Thanks for the comment :)
Thanks for the review Thom hahaha :)
Sorry guys, I honestly did enjoy you while you were on, but just couldn't remember anything afterwards.
Blame the deluge of other (inferior) bands!
As a Ginger fan were you not aware then that the drummer from that 'unmemorable' band Pocket Godzilla's is actualy in the video for vanilla radio? Seems more like a review on the people that attended rather than the music.
As mentioned, I was stood a ways back for their set, so didn't even see the drummer.
And based on the fact that I never gave Pocket Godzilla's a 'mark', I didn't review them technically.
Also, it would be remiss of me not to mention the surroundings of the 'festival', considering how terrible they were.
Hopefully I'll see PG playing around the city at some point in the future and then can give a better accounting of their show.
But isnt that the point? If you go to review a gig stand closer to get a better idea of what you are reviewing otherwise it kind of counter balances your point. You cant give a bad review of something you arent really watching can you?
I didn't review it though. I said was was stood nearer the back, the sound was bad, and I couldn't remember much about the band. Hence, no 'stars', as I didn't have enough to go on. Rest of the bands I saw, I did.
Believe it or not, I didn't go to see Pocket Godzillas, try not to take it personally.
In fact, I see Pocket Godzillas AND The Burning Crows are playing up the road next month. I shall go and I shall review it here. Can't say fairer than that.
We loved your review! It'd be great to see you there and to have you do another ;)
:) I didnt take it all personal. I just found it all sounded slightly bitter until you got to Ginger. I had to witness every band from the press pit and I didnt agree with you at all on any of them. Maybe you should have just reviewed Ginger and left all the others out. Just a thought. Definately check out the other bands too. :)
I did enjoy Dove and Boweevil, and whilst they were on The Burning Crows, and I thought Big Num were great (so much so that I bought their album as soon as I got home!)so it wasn't all bad! Just called it how I saw it :)
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